September 4, 2012

Men And Women Are Different, Duh!

You know, it really shouldn’t surprise us that men and women are completely different. It’s the way God planned it from the beginning. Genesis 1:27 says, “So God created man in His own image, in the image of God, He created him; male and female, He created them.” God created men and women the same in a very important aspect. We’re both created in the image of God. That is, we both have the capacity for spiritual things. That makes us different from all the other animals. You never see a dog kneeling in prayer. You never see a cow reading the Bible. We are the only ones that God created to have a capacity to have a relationship with God, a capacity for spiritual things. We’re created in the image of God, and being in God’s image, it means that both of us have the highest value placed upon us from our creator. Our value is the same in God’s eyes. We’re created equal in God’s eyes. But, I want you to notice the words ‘male and female.’ Even though we have the same value in God’s eyes, the highest price that could ever be placed upon any of God’s creation, God also created us very differently. He intentionally, from the beginning, created us male and female.

If you’re going to understand how to get along with your co-workers, how to get along with your boss or your employees, how to get along with a husband or a wife or your kids or your friends, you’ve got to know there are major differences in the way men and women tend to process life. I want to point out a major one from the very beginning. Women are connectors. Now men, we’re not quite as good as women are at connecting things together and putting life altogether in these connections because men are not really connectors. Men are compartmentalizers.

Now, let’s go all the way back to the first man and woman to see how this all started. Genesis 2:22 says, “Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib He had taken out of the man, and He brought her to the man.” So God made man from the earth. That’s why men are earthier than women. God made woman from the soul of man. There was a soul connection. That’s why women are connectors. That’s how most women tend to process life. They connect it altogether. Every thought and issue is connected to every other thought and issue in some way. This, by the way, is why most women are great at multi-tasking. Most women are better than men at multi-tasking. That’s why she can talk on the phone, make out a grocery list, plan a business meeting, calm an upset child while putting on her make-up, all at the same time – WHILE DRIVING! You know it’s true! I don’t recommend it, but it’s true.

Men and women are different in that you need to understand in order to build these healthy relationships. Understand that women, by nature, are intuitive. We all talk about women’s intuition. We know that. Men, on the other hand, by nature, are adventurous. Let’s go back again to the first man and woman and look at Genesis 2:7. It says, “The time came when the Lord God formed a man’s body from the dust of the ground and breathed into it the breath of life. And man became a living person.” Now, Eve was created in the Garden of Eden, in this place of security and great beauty – created in the perfect place, the Garden of Eden. Adam, on the other hand, was created before the Garden of Eden was created. He was created outside the Garden in the wilderness, in the untamed, unsafe place.

There is one thing I want to point out that’s real important. If you don’t get this, you will never understand how to get along with the opposite sex. Women, by nature, are communicators. While men, on the other hand, are NOT. That’s all I want to say about that. Men aren’t so good at communicating. That’s why florists advertise on Valentine’s Day, “Say it with flowers” because they know we men have a tough time saying it with words. Buying a card is not a problem. It’s what to write in that card that stumps most of us. So, I have it figured out. I’d buy those cards that are already filled with words – these flowery, beautiful poems – and there’s just no room to write anything. I just write the name Kerry and give it to my wife, and it really means a lot to her.

The first step in overcoming the differences is to understand each other’s differences. The more you understand why people act and react the way they do, the more patient you’ll be. If you’re not aware of why people act the way they do, then you’ll misjudge them. You’ll misunderstand them, and it will be a source of conflict. You will live in constant conflict. Then you take it to the next step. Accept each other’s differences. If you want to learn to understand each other’s differences and accept each other’s differences.  Then you move to that third step. Appreciate each other’s differences.  1 Thessalonians 5:11 says, “So encourage each other to build each other up, just as you are already doing.”