Sometimes our relationships can really be hurt because of arrogance. When the woman was washing Jesus’ feet, Simon assumed he knew what Jesus was thinking, but he was ignorant, he had no clue, but Jesus knew what Simon was thinking. That’s why Jesus said this to Simon in Luke 7:44-46. “Then He turned toward the woman and said to Simon, ‘Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give Me any water for My feet, but she wet My feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You did not give Me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing My feet. You did not put oil on My head, but she has poured perfume on My feet.’” Simon’s real issue was arrogance. Simon not only judged the woman, but he thought he was better than Jesus. He didn’t wash Jesus’ feet. He didn’t offer Jesus water to wash His feet. In fact, in that day, washing a guest’s feet was an essential formality. If you didn’t wash your guest’s feet, at least you would offer them a bowl of water so they could wash their own feet. Simon didn’t do that. Not offering a bowl of water so a guest could wash their own feet was an extreme insult.
You see, Simon was basically thinking Jesus, You are so lucky I invited You to my home. I decided I wanted You to come to my house so we could question You, and You are so fortunate to be in my house because I’m a prominent leader. I’m very religious. I’m very pious. I’m very intelligent. Everyone wants a ticket to my dinner parties, and I’m inviting You. He was so proud that he didn’t even offer to wash Jesus’ feet. This gets to the core issue. The reason we’re ignorant in relationships is always arrogance. It always comes down to arrogance. When I don’t take the time to ask my wife what she’s thinking, when I assume I know but don’t really take the time to get into it and find out, it’s more than ignorance, it’s arrogance. When I think I know what her needs are without taking the time to find out what her needs are, it’s arrogance. So guys, we can’t claim the ignorance defense even though we would like to, – well I don’t really get it, I’m a guy, I’m clueless – because ignorance is really a result of arrogance. It’s okay to be ignorant about your spouse’s needs, but it’s not okay to stay ignorant about your spouse’s needs. You see, it becomes arrogance if I don’t take the time, energy, and effort to find out what her needs are.
The real problem that keeps our relationship from going deeper is just arrogance. In what relationship areas do you find yourself being arrogant?