In Ezekiel 36:26 it says, “And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.” A ‘tender responsive heart.’ It’s the kind of heart I need to build extravagant relationships. I have to be open and tenderhearted and responsive. I have to expose my heart. But we are band-aid people. We like a quick cover up to the real us, the real problems in our lives. We like to hide our hearts. We don’t want anyone to see our true hearts, so we put band-aids over our heart because we don’t want people to know our true hearts because we might get rejected. We use all kinds of band-aids to cover our hearts. We use the band-aids of possessions. We use symbols of success, and people look at those symbols, and they say oh, he’s successful, she’s successful, and they never stop to look deeper into the wounded heart that you have. We use those symbols of success, those band-aids of possessions, to cover up our emptiness, to cover up our heart, and we have some nice band-aids. We drive our band-aids. We wear our band-aids. We live in our band-aids, hoping that that will cover up the emptiness in our heart.
There is not only the band-aid of possessions, but there is the band-aid of pretending. We put on a band-aid smile and pretend like everything’s perfect, so people will be envious of us and say, wow, they’ve got it made. They never seem to have any problems. We act like everything is just great, but on the inside, we’re hurting. We cover up our hearts. We use the band-aid of protecting. That’s really the reason we put band-aids over our heart, because if I really expose my heart, and share my true feelings, you may not like them. If I really show you who I am, if you really see my faults and my fears, and I share my true feelings with you, you may reject me. So I put band-aids over my heart because I don’t want to be rejected. I want to protect my heart. But, you have to tear away the band-aids from your heart that keep people from seeing the real you. They keep people from seeing who you really are. We need to start living from our heart to build deep relationships. I’ve got to start ripping off the band-aids from my heart, and expose my heart, so I can live from my heart, and people can see who I really am, if I’m going to build extravagant relationships.
It’s painful when you start tearing away band-aids that have been over your heart for years, and you start living from your heart. In those moments where I live totally from my heart, my heart totally exposed, I feel fully alive. In those moments where I live from my heart, I feel like I’m being who I was created to be. I want to live in those moments more and more, totally exposing my heart. If I’m going to build extravagant, deep relationships, it takes everything; I am pouring my heart out 100%. All my energy and creativity and effort, and all my heart and emotions, everything I am, to build the kind of relationships God wants me to build. That’s why we settle for band-aid relationships. That’s why we live in the shallows rather then moving to the deeper life because we don’t want to expose our heart. We just have to tear away the band-aids and be exposed.